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Issue 247 - 7/29/2007
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The Truth About Cats, Vicks & Dogs
by Bucktowndusty

They cut off balls.

They remove ovaries, too.

Michael Vick?

No, veterinarians do, under the approval of their biggest spokesman, and Michael Vick foe, Bob Barker.

What’s crueler: training dogs to be the biggest, meanest, fastest, strongest dogs possible so they can defeat equally big, mean, fast, strong dogs (you know, like the NFL does with football players); or spaying and neutering dogs, making them domesticated gimps incapable of carrying out the greatest God-given ability of all living beings – reproducing life?

I think they both are. If Michael Vick is guilty as charged, let someone electrocute him when his knee gives out and he can’t defend himself from vicious linebackers anymore. Let someone slam him into the concrete when he can no longer pass the ball. Treat others how you want to be treated, right?

But, let's also scream over less blatant offenders. Help control the pet population? OK, how about we spay and neuter humans, decreasing the population pool of potential pet buyers? Isn't it odd that those who hate Vick for ending the life of dogs in their prime don’t bat an eyelash at snuffing out millions of potential dogs and cats?

It’s the classic liberal mindset. Sure allowing dogs to live is fine, but allowing them of the ability to produce life isn't because it doesn’t fit into schedules or budgets. Millions of righteous Americans decide the fate of pets each year, just as Vick did. His was just more violent and crude. If only he had electrocuted the dogs with, say, cattle prods, or given them death injections that put them to sleep first so that they don’t feel any pain, we wouldn’t be talking about Vick today.

So, yes, punish Vick if guilty, but also think about the millions of guilty verdicts each one of us pet owners carry around our necks for the past "procedures" we've bought and paid for.



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A Day At The Park
by A. Hamilton

Have you noticed that our congress has pigeon-holed any notion of securing our borders?

The reason is that they are too busy investigating every move the Bush Administration has made in the past six years. The most horrendous waste of time is the perpetual badgering of attorney general Alberto Gonzales over the firing of several federal prosecutors.

Democrats keep calling Gonzales back for questioning in hopes that he will contradict himself so they can stand up and scream, "Perjury." They remind me of seniors playing Bingo who are waiting for, "Under the N - 42," so they can scream, "Bingo."

Overall, the Democrats remind me of senior's day at the amusement park. Here, I can visualize Nancy and Reid riding the bumper cars blindfolded, or Schumer playing pin the tail on the elephant. Having the time of her life is the smartest woman in the world (Hillary) riding in the tethered airplane, spinning around and around, followed by Obama, followed by Edwards, followed by Bill Richardson, followed by Dennis Kucinich, who is followed by the smartest woman in the world, all going nowhere.

Strange, but over in the south end of the amusement part is the game of busting the Piñata and no one is there.



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